Category Archives: Writing Guest

Guest Writer Jeff: Proof I Went To College

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This is another great slice of life from Jeff. It was soo funny I had to pass it along.

Here’s an interesting tidbit from my new job (and proof that my tuition dollars were well-spent):

I was talking to a woman about her payment that was 3 mo past due, and she would not talk to me, she said I should have everything on the computer in front of me. I read off the arrangements we had set up with her, and she kept saying “I don’t know. I don’t know,” (in the kind of way that makes you realize how you talked to your parents when you were 15) until, finally flabbergasted, she said, “Do you think I don’t know I owe you money? Do you think I’m stupid?!” To which I calmly replied, “Ma’am, I’m not questioning the veracity your ability to cogitate such esoteric financial quandaries, I’m just trying to collect a past-due payment.” To which she replied,”Uhhhh…” then she hung up.

The end.

The Fall Of Democracy?

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Something to think about:

At about the time our original 13 states adopted their new constitution, in the year 1787, Alexander Tyler (a Scottish history professor at The University of Edinborough) had this to say about “The Fall of The Athenian Republic” some 2,000 years prior.
“A democracy is always temporary in nature; it Simply cannot exist as a permanent form of government. A democracy will continue to exist up until the time that voters discover that they can vote themselves generous gifts from the public treasury. From that moment on, the majority always votes for the candidates who promise the most benefits from the public treasury, with the result that every democracy will finally collapse due to loose fiscal policy, (which is) always followed by a dictatorship.”

“The average age of the worlds greatest civilizations from the beginning of history, has been about 200 years. During those 200 years, these nations always progressed through the following sequence:

From Bondage to spiritual faith;
From spiritual faith to great courage;
From courage to liberty;
From liberty to abundance;
From abundance to complacency;
From complacency to apathy;
From apathy to dependence;
From dependence back into bondage.”


Professor Joseph Olson of Hamline University School of Law, St. Paul, Minnesota, points out some interesting facts concerning the most recent Presidential election:
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Guest Writer Matt: Konichiwa Or Something Like That

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This is from a friend of mine in Navy Intelligence. For security reasons, I have edited out a few details.

Hello all,

For those of you that don’t know, I’m now stationed on the USS XXXXXXX which is currently docked in Yokosuka, Japan. It’s 6:36 p.m. on Tuesday, here in Japan. For all of you in the eastern time zone it is 5:36a.m. on Tuesday. If you sleep on anything larger than a cot, you should fall to your knees in praise right now. My bed is roughly 6 ft long and 2 ft wide. If I make a 90 degree angle with my arm and put my tricep on my bed, my fingers touch the bed above me.

Steve Young doesn’t know anything about getting concussions until he spends one day on a ship. I hit my head on a variety of bars and pipes, which I believe are there for no other purpose than bodily harm, at least five times a day. You must be thinking, how hard can it be to dodge an object that doesn’t move. However, when you duck to avoid object A, object B cracks into the other side of you head. If you ever want to get me a gift, a helmet would be a wonderful idea. The weather is basically the same as it is in TN/MD right now. On a clear day I can see Mt. Fuji from the ship even though it’s three hours away. Traffic in Japan makes D.C. or Atlanta look like an open road. I’ve only been here since Satuday so I’ll spend my next few months doing qualifications and learning how to be a “real sailor”. I hope this email finds you in good health and good spirits. If any of you want to start a black market electronics underground railroad, just let me know. On a more serious note if there is anything Japanese under 100 bucks just say the word, and I’ll see what I can do. I’ve met a few people that are pretty cool, but most people aren’t exactly my “peers”.

I’d love to hear from you guys, at XXXXXX@hotmail.com. May God richly bless you all.

Stopping By Woods On Life’s Journey

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Another great work by Robert Frost along with some insights into the poem that I wrote back in my college days.

Stopping By Woods On A Snowy Evening
by Robert Frost

Whose woods these are I think I know.
His house is in the village though;
He will not see me stopping here
To watch his woods fill up with snow.
My little horse must think it queer
To stop without a farmhouse near
Between the woods and frozen lake
The darkest evening of the year.
He gives his harness bells a shake
To ask if there is some mistake.
The only other sound’s the sweep
Of easy wind and downy flake.
The woods are lovely, dark and deep.
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.

“When viewed as a parable, Robert Frost’s poem “Stopping By Woods On A Snowy Evening” can give several insights into life. To gain such insight one must first understand the poem’s parabolic meaning. The writings of St. Paul help us to more clearly see the poem’s meaning. The application to life is then obvious.
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Beyond The Book’s Cover

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This is something I found as I go through my old Mac files converting them over to the PC for posterity. This is something I wrote my Sr. year in high school:

Slam! I check my car door, yep it’s locked. As I start towards my class I look over my shoulder to check my lights — off. Now I could focus on the business at hand: getting to class on time. I steady my bag with one hand and break into a stride. All those cross country practices were about to pay off. Up past “B” gym and down along the soccer field I run, as I do I pass others running to their classes. I dodge people as I enter the building and head down toward the World History room. I check my watch: twenty seconds. I slow down and walk casually in the room. The teacher looks up from the chalkboard and nods his hello as I make my way over to my seat. Mr. Reddick comes over and shows me some papers he wants me to staple then turns back to the class.

“Aaah!” I think to myself as I start hammering out World History packets, “being an aid sure beats having another class.” In a few minutes I’m done. I then swing around so that I’m seated on the table with my feet in the chair I had been sitting in. So seated I passively watch the class while reading the paper.

“Hmm…..More troops sent to Somalia….” I read as my mind and ears begin to wander.

“…..The Tigris and Euphrates…” Ah yes! Mesopotamia, I remember learning this last year. Mr. Reddick asks a question. A simple one really and quickly gets a response. Another, this one rather thought provoking; I even pause to contemplate it. Then I hear someone starting to answer. I don’t even have to look up from my paper to know the speaker. The slow, slurred drawl is unmistakable. Slightly amused, I listen intrigued at what she would say. A look of shock, surprise and even some awe crosses my face; a look I quickly conceal behind my paper. I sort of chuckle to myself, not out of fun but out of disbelief. Amazing. Her comment held more insight than any I had heard thus far all year…..

I learn something every day. Perhaps I’m curious, or just lucky; I think it’s both. Something long preconceived in my mind got shattered that day, something I hadn’t really even known was there. All of this though comes back to one question: Who is more handicapped — someone who uses his small gifts, or those who squander their large ones?