Archive for January, 2007
F-35 - Joint Strike Fighter
The future of western fighter jets is almost here. The Joint Strike Fighter is a fighter family developed for the Air Force, Navy & Marines. The fact that 70-80% of the 3 variants is the same allows the tax payer a savings of 20-25% per plane. Which can get to be significant as it will eventually replace a large portion of the planes in service (4000 or so).
The Air Force and Navy models are very similar with the exception of the necessary changes for carrier landing. The Marine variant however has a sweet vertical take-off and landing ability. All 3 have the latest in stealth and electronic intel gathering technology. Not to mention the serious payload of weapons they can carry internally. Carrying the weapons internally reduces drag and therefore increases range; It also reduces the radar signature of the plane. Everything from bunker busters to cruise missiles to conventional missiles can be carried stealthily to targets at super sonic speeds (something previous stealth bombers lacked).
All in all, it looks pretty sweet and should be put into full service in the next 4-5 years.
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Different Schools, Different Parents
Rob, a Middle School Teacher, sent me an email regarding the difference between the parents at his new School verses the more, uhm, urban School where he worked last year:
Well, the parents here are a little different than say Tony’s mom last year (the 250 pound woman with 3 inch red fingernails, that came to school, yanked tony out of his seat by his collar, with a barage of profanity, pulled him into the hall, pulled off his belt, and popped him 3 times with his own belt).
I caught a kid stealing his lunch yesterday. I had him write a confession, "I, Kevin xxxxxx stole my lunch on 1/9/07" and sign it. our Discipline Principal told me that his father came in to a manditory meeting, very upset that the school used and continued to use the word "stealing" to describe his sons actions. He felt his son merely, "circumvented procedures" end quote. Even after, showing his son had clearly understood procedures the previous 15 days that he bought his lunch, according to computer records (they can buy lunch using a pin number). the father still refused to say that his son "stole." Yup. This is for real. Unbelievable.
Things I’ve Learned In Tennessee
This was a fairly funny forward I got recently. I improved it a bit and voila:
Things I’ve Learned Living In Tennessee:
Possums sleep in the middle of the road with their feet in the air.
Onced and twiced are words.
It’s not a shopping cart; It’s a buggy.
Ice tea/Sweet tea is appropriate for all meals.
The above statement is actually redundant; Iced tea IS sweet tea. If you order tea in TN you will get sweet tea. If you specify unsweet tea, your tea will come with a spoon and an assortment of sweeteners so you can sweeten it personally.
The Meat Zone
Quotes from my favorite Aqua Teen episode: The Meat Zone. (A spoof on the Dead Zone of course)
Jeep Trailhawk Concept
Jeep has a new concept car out: the Trailhawk. It seeks to mix the fun of the Wrangler with the hauling capacity of a Grand Cherokee. This is accomplished through three removable roof panels. Two above the driver and one in the rear.
Who says a soccer mom can’t have a convertable? Not to mention legitimate off-road capabilities - you never know where those soccer matches might be held…
DUI Tennessee Style
I found this pretty funny and ingenius… (who cares if it’s actually true)
From the county where drunk driving is considered a sport, comes this absolutely true story.
Recently a routine police patrol parked outside a bar in Paris , Tennessee . After last call the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so intoxicated that he could barely walk.
The man stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes, with the officer quietly observing. After what seemed an eternity in which he tried his keys on five different vehicles, the man managed to find his car and fall into it. He sat there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off.
Finally, he started the car, switched the wipers on and off (it was a fine, dry summer night), flicked the blinkers on and off a couple of times, honked the horn and then switched on the lights. He moved the vehicle for ward a few inches, reversed a little and then remained still for a few more minutes as some more of the other patrons’ vehicles left.