DUI Tennessee Style

I found this pretty funny and ingenius… (who cares if it’s actually true)

From the county where drunk driving is considered a sport, comes this absolutely true story.

Recently a routine police patrol parked outside a bar in Paris , Tennessee . After last call the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so intoxicated that he could barely walk.

The man stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes, with the officer quietly observing. After what seemed an eternity in which he tried his keys on five different vehicles, the man managed to find his car and fall into it. He sat there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off.

Finally, he started the car, switched the wipers on and off (it was a fine, dry summer night), flicked the blinkers on and off a couple of times, honked the horn and then switched on the lights. He moved the vehicle for ward a few inches, reversed a little and then remained still for a few more minutes as some more of the other patrons’ vehicles left.

At last, when his was the only car left in the parking lot, he pulled out and drove slowly down the road.

The police officer, having waited patiently all this time, now started up his patrol car, put on the flashing lights, promptly pulled the man over and administered a breathalyzer test. To his amazement, the breathalyzer indicated no evidence that the man had consumed any alcohol at all! Dumbfounded, the officer said, "I’ll have to ask you to accompany me to the police station. This breathalyzer equipment must be broken."

"I doubt it," said the truly proud Hillbilly . "Tonight I’m the designated decoy."

Nature Quotes


"The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quiet, alone with the heavens, nature and God. Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be and that God wishes to see people happy, amidst the simple beauty of nature."
Anne Frank

"The richness I achieve comes from Nature, the source of my inspiration."
Claude Monet

"Nature will bear the closest inspection. She invites us to lay our eye level with her smallest leaf, and take an insect view of its plain."
Henry David Thoreau

New LS

The new LS from Lexus packs a punch… 380 hp stock!? To keep those ponies in line you get an 8 speed -that’s right, eight speed- transmission.

Definitely worth a look if you can afford sixty large.? Enjoy the lux & speed!

Finish Your Plate, There Are Fat People In Africa That Wish They Had Your Food

That’s right, obesity is getting out of hand in Africa. The World Health Organization is quite concerned. Just don’t correct your mother….

My favorite part of this article is the BEST EVER excuse not to lose weight: "I don’t want people to think I’ve got TB or AIDs…" Try and top that one American Fatties!

And apparently the fat now officially outnumber the starving: "Worldwide, an estimated 1 billion people are overweight, compared to 800 million who are undernourished." Way to go progress!