Archive for the 'Bizarre' Category
My Very Own Potty Book
Yeah, it really speaks for itself…
Ok, you probably still have questions. Imagitales.com allows you to customize your kid's books with THEIR photo. Making your child the star of his (or her) favorite books!
Fines Brought To You By The Letter Q
"DIYARBAKIR, Turkey (Reuters) - A Turkish court fined 20 people for using the letters Q and W on placards at a Kurdish new year celebration, under a law banning characters not used in the Turkish alphabet, rights campaigners said Tuesday…" Yeah, I know, it's too weird for words. Who bans letters? It's like… I don't know, I'm not sure how to describe it… it's bizzare.
Weatherman Uncovers Plot
An Idaho weatherman recently gained attention for an unusual theory that Hurricane Katrina was caused by the Japanese mafia using a Russian electromagnetic generator. Scott Steven believes a little-known oversight in physical laws makes it possible to create and control storms using a Cold War-era weapon allegedly made by the Russians in 1976. Stevens even more recently has quit the television station KPVI-TV. His departure comes after station officials learned the "Make a Donation" link on Stevens' Web site, WeatherWars.info (is anyone else a little frightened that weatherwars.COM was already taken?), where he expounds on his theory, was connected to Stevens' KPVI e-mail address. What can I say? You can't make this stuff up.
Peter… Pan?
The home page of Peter Pan created by: Randy Constan is, well, a train wreck that just won't stop. I tried to find a quote that would sum up his page, but this web site DEFIES description… well at least in any succinct way. Anyway, check it out BUT be warned you will be amazed (but not in a good way). Especially on the photos page that keeps going and going… when all the while you're thinking no one person could possibly have ever worn so many bad outfits — let alone make a web site about it.
Cat Pee Starts Fire
Oops! Kitty did an uh-oh! Some cats used a fax as a toilet and set off a house fire. Whew, another reason to be a dog person - there are already so many… Even if my new dog ate my PS controlers… kinda pales in comparison to the whole house.
MoveOn… Where?
So I keep hearing about this MoveOn.org… and since I'm not sure where I'm moving on from and to, I figured I would give it a look-see. Apparently MoveOn is planning on doing just that… sslloowwllyy. Here's the first sentence, on the top story, on the main page: George W. Bush is going to make Social Security privatization a key part of his State of the Union address this week. For those of you scratching your heads: The State of the Union was February 2, 2005. There is also a petition to tell congress how much your against personal accounts. Their goal: to deliver 500,000 signatures to Congress in just 10 days… it doesn't really specify which 10 days, but it is an older story than the above one about the up-coming State of the Union. So that means they are about two months behind their target. Surprising really since they are only looking for 0.169% of all the people about to get screwed by stock market returns on their retirement savings! Being the altruistic soul that I am, I did what i could to help. I called up my old friend Barbra Boxer and told her about their plight and she told me would do what she could to help. At last count Barbra had added her name to the cause — well, let's just say a lot. Keep up the good work Barb! My favorite part of the site is where they want you "the masses" to donate money to fund the media propaganda against social security reform. Can I just keep my money and promise that I will sway my own opinion myself with pretty pictures and motivational music??? So after a quick look, I must admit that I still don't get it. Especially the Moving On part… move on from what? The current agenda? The landslide election for Red States? Why to I get a picture of Officer Barbrady saying "OK People, move along, there's nothing to see here."
Woman Impaled By Tub Faucet?
Apparently a woman somehow was able to impale herself on the faucet in the tub. Now she survived, so I don't have to pull any punches about how bizzare this really is. I mean come on! I've seen a lot of faucets and they all seem to be pretty -uh- round-ish. I mean if I was to somehow body slam my tub faucet… pain, yes… bruising, sure… but IMPALED? -shrug-
Red Hot Balls
A recent report out claims that Laptop Computers May Affect Male Fertility… yup, you’re wizbang new laptop could be causing your boys to not work so well. The funny thing is it’s not really your laptop so much as using your lap. Apparently, “Elevated scrotal temperatures have been linked to male infertility.” — Oh yeah, that’s a great quote. Lap-top use increases those temperatures. The study found that using a laptop caused a increase of +37F but interestingly the simple position of holding something on your lap (without a laptop or anything else) resulted in a +36F increase. So really if you’re worried about your boys, you should never sit down again… or switch to boxers… or stop reading scientific studies…
Cher Photo Shoot
My new job is never dull. I’ve removed names to protect the innocent, but this was just too random not to mention.
On a recent concert stop during Cher?s ongoing Living Proof Tour, the Tour turned to [our company] for photo assistance. Store XXXX in Chattanooga, TN was called in to do a photo shoot - a passport photo shoot that is. Head Photo Specialist Christina received a call from Cher?s Tour Manager. The tour needed passport photos for 80+ people before starting the International portion of their tour - so of course they turned to the photo excellence of the [company’s] photo department. In addition to passport photos, the tour also needed additional photos for work visas in various countries resulting in the need for 6 total pictures for each person (3 passport shots). Joining Christina in the shoot was Ruby former HPS and currently PHT at the same store along with District Photo Supervisors Adam and Scott. All four employees worked together to form a seamless assembly line at the venue allowing Cher?s entourage to quickly stream through the process. Over 240 passport shots were taken, processed and delivered to grateful tour members including Cher herself. Since passport photos are essentially glorified polaroids, the company made a tidy profit even after a 10% bulk discount. Meanwhile, I got another great story to add to my already colorful career….
All in a days work. :D
Prayer Outsourcing
Apparently joining the rest of the world in outsourcing everything to India, the Catholic church is transfering prayer requests and special masses (done for a certain donation amount) to the priests in India, that both have less work and income than their American counterparts.
I will resist the obvious commentary on this as I think most people should be about to see the several layers of mockery this makes of the relationship between man and God. I would like to point out the irony that I see when compared to many computer-related professions. I mean if your priest can charge you (much like a lawyer or accountant) for his time praying for you… shouldn’t it be reasonable for your techie friend to be compensated the next time he spends two hours fixing your computer?